Whispers of the Old Gods -- Early Card Reviews

I’m not sure how regularly I can be doing this, since as my main review blog states, real life is a bitch right now and I can’t even get a lot of reviews out in a timely manner. This was actually a small project started off near the start of the expansion’s announcement, but got kind of delayed. Oh well. Whatever the case, I’m reviewing the 8 or so cards that have been revealed. Sometimes I wish that Blizzard didn’t reveal all 150 or whatever cards before the expansion is released so there would be a couple of surprises in there and people won’t just be ‘time to craft that super-awesome-sounding deck that we’ve made a month before the expansion hits’ and all that. But eh, that’s how Blizzard rolls.

Honestly there’s not much that have been released, and out of the ones that we do get most of them have been somewhat underwhelming. It’s not quite TGT-level of underwhelming, though, because without seeing the true scope of the WOTOG expansion (that’s a mouthful, WOTOG, and probably could be an Old God’s name itself) and getting a feel of a Naxxramas-less, GvG-less metagame, it would be kind of easy to just dismiss the m’eh-looking cards before realizing that, hey, alongside the TGT cards, suddenly some of the previously average-level or above-average-but-not-quite-good-enough cards might actually be the new viable option.

Also, a couple smaller announcements with the new patch: it crashes on Android and turns your device screen pink, they’ve added 9 extra deck slots, a little deckbuilder help to create a bunch of pre-made archetypes, a new Paladin hero skin (Liadrin, unlocked if you get a level 20 WoW character) and pre-orders for the WOTOG expansion.

Anyway, quick card reviews:

·       Polluted Hoarder: One of the themes of the expansion is the ‘corruption’ of classic cards, making them far more powerful or generally just similar-but-different. Because corruption by the Great Elder Ones will bestow you power at the cost of madness and all that. Polluted (Po-Loot-ed, get it?) Hoarder, is, obviously, a simple scaled-up Loot Hoarder. It’s still got its old Deathrattle of drawing a card, but is a 4-mana 4/2, a simple scale-up from Loot Hoarder’s 2-mana 2/1. He’s definitely a viable 4-mana drop, especially in Arena when you’re not too picky as long as the card is solid. Now the question is, where to fit it? Piloted Shredder may be going out of rotation, but when is Polluted Hoarder more advantageous, than, say, a Chillwind Yeti or a Cult Master? It’s an interesting card, that’s for sure, one that helps decks that want to draw cards, and the 4 attack certainly makes it far more punishing to ignore than a Loot Hoarder. Not sure that it’s actually good in Constructed, but it’s definitely a decent card. Of course, that’s what I said about half the TGT set, and not a lot of them are played right now.

·       Validated Doomsayer: Other than its initial statline and its happy artwork, the Validated Doomsayer has little in common with its Classic namesake. The Validated Doomsayer is a 5-mana 0/7… which will gain 7 attack on the start of your next turn. You don’t attack until the second turn anyway, so hide this behind a Taunt or a Conceal and you get a 5-mana 7/7, which is insane value and far more stable than the likes of Fel Reaver, Anima Golem or Eerie Statue. The problem is, well, it’s particularly vulnerable to silence, if you don’t have means of protection your enemy’s minions can just smack its face and kill it with no damage to them and it’s vulnerable to Shadow Word: Pain. Of course, though, that all depends if your enemy has a counter to the Validated Doomsayer. I like this card. Not sure if it’s really that good, but it’s unique and fun.

·       Corrupted Healbot: The Ancient Healbot is angry that it is going out of rotation, so it went all rambo, got a couple of guns and tentacles and heals your enemy instead. The Corrupted Healbot is a 5-mana 6/6 that restores 8 health to the enemy hero… which is honestly quite bad. It’s decent in a control-heavy deck, of course, but the statline of 6/6 isn’t quite worth the disadvantage. 6/7 or 7/6 (Venture Co Mercenary and Boulderfist Ogre, respectively), maybe, but 6/6 is just m’eh. Hell, Pit Fighter is just one attack below this for the same cost and no disadvantage – and no, the Mech tag isn’t worth a damn since all the GvG cards are gone. Zombie Chow gets away with healing the opponent hero it because it’s a 1-drop with stats of a 2-drop, and it’s liable to die in the early turns where your enemy isn’t damaged anyway. Corrupted Healbot probably isn’t going to be very useful in decks other than gimmicky Auchenai Priest decks, where it will deal 8 damage to your enemy’s face which is insane.

·       Hogger, Doom of Elwynn: Hogger on steroids! Henceforth known as Doom Hogger because I don’t want to type that long-ass name, Doom Hogger makes me happy because this means that alternate versions of the same character can be turned into cards. That gives me hope for freaking Illidan Stormrage getting a properly good card, or alternate versions of, say, Arthas Menethil as a Paladin and as a Lich King. The original Hogger is a 6-mana 4/4 that summons a 2/2 Gnoll with Taunt at the end of each turn. Doom Hogger also summons 2/2 Gnoll, but does so every time it is damaged. It’s a 7-mana 6/6, which is significantly harder to kill. It may not be as devastating as Dr. Boom, obviously, but on paper it’s definitely better than the original Hogger. It plays to an enrage-style deck, though for obvious reasons it’s not quite as spammable as a Grim Patron. Things like Cruel Taskmaster, Wild Pyromancer and Whirlwind all trigger Doom Hogger. Warrior may be losing Death’s Bite and Unstable Ghoul, but there’s a lot that can trigger Doom Hogger to spawn a bunch of little Taunt dudes… and the dream, of course, is to Bolster them. It’s definitely better than Troggzor, which relies on your opponent casting a spell – who’s going to do that, really? Whereas you can proc Doom Hogger on your own. That said, though, I think Doom Hogger is going to be one of those ‘good, but average’ legendaries like Toshley or Gruul if you don’t have anything for that slot. Besides, y’know, Cthulhu Hogger! How can you not love that?

·       Eater of Secrets: Look at that skinny Faceless One. Eater of Secrets is a 4-mana 2/4, that destroys your enemy’s secrets and gains +1/+1 for each one destroyed. It’s kind of shit if you’re facing a non-Secret deck, since 4-mana 2/4 is, well, freaking terrible. But against Mage and Hunter decks with secrets it can be a 3/5 or even a 4/6, and as if Mysterious Challenger Secret Paladins aren’t punished enough with losing Avenge, you can drop a 4-mana 6/8 and destroy all their secrets without triggering them and starting off a stupid chain reaction. This rather cleverly also stopgaps Mysterious Challenger in Wild Mode without having to nerf the card itself. Otherwise, though, it’s extremely underwhelming. Maybe if its base stats was 3/4 or if it’s a 3-mana… but then it might be too much of an overkill against Secret Pallies? I dunno. With Kezan Mystic out of the rotation it’s nice to have another anti-Secret card that isn’t just a rehash.

·       Beckoner of Evil: The first of… nine? Twelve? Cards in the expansion that’ll interact with C’Thun, the Beckoner of Evil is a simple 2-mana 2/3 (River Crocolisk) with the battlecry of giving C’Thun +2/+2… wherever it is. See, the gimmick of C’Thun is that it gains power as its cultists summon it to the world, just like the Lovecraftian old gods, who slowly awake from their slumber when summoned by cultists. C’Thun gains the buff wherever it is. In your deck, in your hand, in the field… even [i]dead[/i]. The Beckoner seems extremely simple, and we’ll see if she’s actually really weak compared to the other C’Thun synergy cards, but to note is, well, she will give C’Thun +4/+4 with Brann Bronzebeard for a mere 2 mana. I think Brann would probably be an auto include in all C’Thun decks for that fact alone.

·       Twilight Elder: Gnomes be insane! Twilight Elder is a 3-mana 3/4 (Spider Tank), again, like the Beckoner, not a bad statline. It gives C’Thun +1/+1 wherever it is at the end of turn, so, um, yeah, drop a Stealth on this crazy gnome and C’Thun can just grow so wildly out of control. If you play this on curve it’s likely to survive at least a turn or two and it’s still a valuable body on its own, so yay for that!

·       C’Thun: So you buff your C’Thun with Twilight Elder, Beckoner of Evil and whatever other cards we haven’t seen yet. What, then? C’Thun is a 10-mana 6/6 that gains buffs from its cultists… and upon entry launches its attack value randomly upon all enemies. Like Avenging Wrath, but more Cthulhu. Obviously bad against a field with Doom Hogger or Frothing Berserker or Gurubashi Berserker, but, y’know, C’Thun himself will probably drop on the battlefield like a 10/10 or just something freakingly huge if you play your cards right and combo them with things like Brann or the Brewmasters to stack up those buffs. And if you have your Brann still alive on turn 10… that’s easily twenty-plus damage just launched like an airstrike all over your enemy. Until we see all the other C’Thun support cards it’s hard to judge him, but come on, you get a motherfucking Elder God for free. Like literally free. He’s definitely potentially strong enough to stand against the meta, especially if that twatty Big Game Hunter (a.k.a. Mr. No-Fun) gets nerfed. I’m not sure if Silences work on C’Thun, though, since they did say that the buff stacks with the player. I’m honestly just happy to see a playstyle that kind of builds around a single card specifically.

·       Stand Against Darkness: Muster for Battle’s big brother, Stand Against Darkness is a five-mana summon five tokens. Which is… a bit worse than Muster for Battle. And the Silver Hand Recruits aren’t that good now that Quartermaster is kind of gone out of rotation. It’s not a bad card, of course, and the amount of hate it receives in some forums is unwarranted. It’s a decent turn 5 play, and Silver Hand Recruits are good to trigger things like Avenge or be targets of buffs like Keeper of Uldaman or Blessing of Kings, but at the end of the day I would rather spend five mana on a proper minion. Yes, Loatheb, Ancient Healbot and Sludge Belcher are out, but there are definitely some better five-drops out there. Maybe Validated Doomsayer or Corrupted Healbot? We’ll see.

·       Giant Sandworm: An 8-mana 8/8 Beast that… can attack again if it kills another minion. Not a difficult task with 8 attack, so it means that the Giant Sandworm can just hit your enemy’s entire board and wipe it out so long as it retains health. And with things like Stablemaster and Bestial Wrath – both criminally underused cards that gives a Beast immune for a turn – the Giant Sandworm can basically clear out an entire board and attack your enemy’s face for 8 damage for no damage to itself, provided there isn’t anything with more than 8 health. Yes, this single beaked worm can literally wipe out an entire board of Molten Giants and Mountain Giants with the help of a single 1-mana spell (which no one remembers exists, I bet). It’s a cool card! I can see people actually making decks to help support the Sandworm, and it’s definitely a cool gimmick that I’m sure to try at least once.

·       Klaxxi Amber-Weaver: Oh, hey, look, our first Mantid card! The Mantids are one of the villains in the Mists of Pandaria storyline, and while they're nowhere as prominent or story-important as Garrosh Hellscream, the Mo'gu or the Sha, the Mantids are still connected to the Old Gods, specifically Y'shaarj. I think (not 100% sure) that the Klaxxi are actually the obligatory 'rebels' that fight against their Old GOd serving brethren, all Drizzt Do'urden and shit. The Amber-Weaver is a four-mana 4/5, basically your bog-standard Chillwind Yeti... with the potential to become a 4/10 if C'Thun has 10 attack by the time you summon the Klaxxi. This probably looks odd at a glance, but I'd argue that the Amber-Weaver might be one of the best cards in the ones that has been so far been revealed, that the only saving grace it has for the sake of balance is that it's in Druid. It's extremely unlikely to give C'Thun 10 attack by turn four if we go by the amount of cards that have been revealed, but you don't have to play the Klaxxi Amber-Weaver at turn 4. There's a bit of flexibility where you can wait for C'Thun to give the Weaver its value and have this card sit out in your hand for a bit, until you can drop this and maybe a different four-drop on turn 8 or something. But dropping it on turn 4 doesn't necessarily make you sad either, because, hey, worst case scenario you get a Yeti, which is a perfectly fine body. It's not something like, oh, Gormok or Kezan Mystic or the 'if you're holding a Dragon' cards where you get a bit penalized stat-wise if you don't meet the requirements. You don't have a 10-attack C'Thun? No problem, have a cool-looking bug Yeti! And it's far from being game-breaking either. Four mana 4/10 is great value, but it's not that insane in Druid. It's safe from Shadow Word X shenanigans, but still vulnerable to Silences. Gamebreaking it ain't, but damn it's a fun-looking card.

Overall it's interesting. I wished they had gone with more Old God and Faceless One cards to help ease the theme of Old Gods more instead of 'let's corrupt and twist some old favourites', but we've seen like less than 5% of the expansion, so it's way too early for the naysayers who think that this is just pushing reprints for money, plus people who hate the idea of Standard Mode. It's definitely far more invigorating than TGT was at this stage in time, though, again, we'll see how good the whole expansion ends up being as more and more cards are shown. 

Cthulhu Fhtagn

The Old Gods be coming, y'all.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKjUgLrDEbI

I really like the Old Gods as a concept! Game-wise they were but one among many epic bosses, but lore-wise the Old Gods' buildup is one of the best things in Warcraft lore. So I'm happy that our next expansion is one centered on the Old Gods.

Game-wise we did get a couple 'corrupted' versions of some old cards, as well as a legendary, C'Thun himself... which apparently everyone that logs in upon the release of the Whispers of the Old Gods expansion (which also marks the beginning of the Year of the Kraken) will get. Hearthpwn has a far more comprehensive rundown of the cards and mechanisms announced, but TL;DR, Old Gods! Standard Mode! Nerf hammer! C'Thun! I love the Old Gods and it's going to be awesome.

While some of the few revealed cards (Corrupted Healbot, Validated Doomsayer) are just fun 'corrupted versions' of classic cards that have insane stats but have some drawbacks, and another (Corrupted Hoarder) is a scaled-up version of a classic card, two of the revealed gimmick cards for the expansion (Beckoner of Evil, Twilight Elder) are apparently what the whole Old God theme is going to be about, how these minions will buff up C'Thun... wherever he is. Which would be awesome with a Brann Bronzebeard on the battlefield, by the way. We're getting a far more specific deck archetype coming up with cards that specify a certain 'master', so yay for that!

Who knows what Yogg-Saron, N'zoth and Y'shaarj will bring to the table? Similar gimmicks, or unique ones of their own?

We heard that Knife Juggler and Leper Gnome are considered for nerfs, but apparently the announcement also listed Big Game Hunter, easily the most fuckwad of a card in my opinion -- worse than Dr. Boom, Grim Patron, Warsong Commander, Knife Juggler, Mad Scientist, Mysterious Challenger, Sludge Belcher or any other card in the game that had been nerfed or thought of as annoying over the years. Also, there is a potential for some cards that are really popular to be redeemed from Wild into Standard. I would love for some of the less-OP ones to show back up... but eh, I don't think they'll do it so soon after implementing Standard Mode.

We get more news in March 21. So yay for that.